The longer distance between two people is a misunderstanding
A misunderstanding can create a huge chasm between two people even if they love each other and have shared many moments together. Mutual understanding is a process that takes time, because getting to know each other in depth takes a lifetime.
Pride, tiredness, anger, etc. are factors that get in the way of understanding and make us close our ears to any explanation. And there are times when it is highly evident that it is a misunderstanding, but we are hypersensitive people, unable to understand that we are being misinterpreted.
But we are responsible for what we say, not what others understand. It means that much of what we say or do can be misinterpreted no matter how hard we try. There are two directions to take, either we distance ourselves out of pride or anger, or we take the trouble to explain (even with drawings) what really happened or what we meant. In short, when a person matters too much to us, we take the second direction.
When a person is offended, it is not always easy to put things into perspective, so it is complex to fix a misunderstanding most of the time. We must be patient, constant and above all not let ourselves be affected, if we know that we did not do it wrong. And if we discover along the way that there is actually something we should apologize for, we should bow our pride and ask for forgiveness.
Pride strengthens misunderstandings and kills relationships
No relationship survives pride, because love has nothing to do with unforgiveness, arrogance and the inability to recognize mistakes. Love is humble, it leans in favour of the other, it is also patient and knows how to wait for the other to listen.
What happens when there is a misunderstanding in a relationship, is that pride immediately appears, displaying its best hurtful words and silence. Pride divides, not unites. That’s why if one of the parties doesn’t put aside the pride, the misunderstanding will only get bigger and bigger until it will be impossible to resolve and both parties will get very hurt.
From pride, we are victims, we do not see what we have misunderstood or what we have failed to do to solve things. And if we can’t see the situation in perspective, we can’t heal the relationship.
This is how a seemingly strong, stable and reliable relationship is destroyed from a small discussion that becomes bigger and bigger. Misunderstandings are resolved when one of the parties decides to lose everything, renounce being right and explain everything from scratch, asking for forgiveness if necessary.
Don’t forget, love is patient, if you really love a person, take the time to explain, to reason and to lose your mind if necessary. But also, with love, teach them to get out of their whims, to see things in perspective. Because to love you have to understand yourself.